He took the fish, went home and started preparing things in the kitchen. When he turned around he noticed that a cat grabbed the fish from the window and ran away with it. He calmly approached the window and shouted “you are not able to do anything because I have the recipe !!”

The first trait that is discussed in the Orkhot Tzaddikim is the attribute of arrogance. This is what is sated: “Someone who wants to uproot the trait of arrogance completely cannot do so by merely changing one’s thoughts. Rather, one must go to the opposite extreme, in action.” He goes on to give details of what this would mean, in practice. If a person has the fault of arrogance and dresses in an arrogant way, he needs to dress- for a while- in the opposite manner. If he said and did things in order to get honor and glory from others, for a while he needs to not only stop doing those things, be he should do actions that are the diametric opposite. He should maintain this until he feels that he has totally uprooted this trait from his being.

Similarly, if someone sees that he has a bad temper and angers easily, he should go- for a while to the opposite extreme. While going to the opposite extreme, he should ignore all slights and insults. He should keep acting this way until the anger is totally uprooted. Then a person should select the “middle path,” and act this way for the rest of his life.

This is the model we need to follow with all negative traits. First we need to go to the opposite extreme and after acting this way for a time, we should act in a balanced way. This is the way to repair all negative traits.

In order to do this properly, make a list of positive traits that you want to improve, and make a list of negative traits that you want to overcome. Then, consistently speak and act in ways that fit the positive patterns. Wit those negative traits that are the most challenging for you, act according to the opposite positive traits for a time.

When we think of different traits as being positive or negative, we need to keep in mind that every trait has its positive times and places, and every trait could be used negatively. When we refer to a trait as being positive or negative, we mean that it is usually positive or negative.

Awareness of our level in reference to various traits is the starting point of knowing what we need to focus on, to grow and improve. The mitzvah to develop our character traits is the command of “Walking in Hashem’s ways”.

Let’s work on some positive traits:

• Appreciative
• Calm
• Caring about others
• Cooperative
• Forgiving
• Happy
• Honors others
• Respectful

Because if you don’t, you’ll just have the recipe (money, name,) but not the fish (manners).

Let’s all walk in the path of Hashem.

Binyamin Jadidi